Most of the time, I am very happy and content. Occasionally though, a vague feeling of sadness creeps in and I try to rid myself of it through meditation, prayer, exercise and service to others. However, when those methods don’t work, I remember to consider if there are any losses that I have not grieved fully enough. Sure enough, I usually have stuffed some unwanted goodbyes under the rug and not dealt with the underlying feeling of abandonment or grief. This week as I felt into my grief, I realized that in this last year, I said goodbye to my mother as she transitioned. Five of my close friends moved away from me off the island of Maui. Another dear friend is facing her death soon. Instead of avoiding the sadness, I let myself cry and open my heart to the energy of grief moving through my body. As I sobbed, I felt myself becoming smaller and smaller until memories of being alone as an infant in an incubator for five weeks, flashed through my mind. I revisited that awful feeling of loneliness. How horrifying it was to have left the comfort of the oneness of existence before birth, and then be isolated from human contact. My perspective then changed, and I was compassionately looking at that little baby from my Higher Self. In the next moment, there was a loving guardian angel standing by my incubator singing to me. I immediately felt the lost baby inside me quiet down. I was reminded that separation is a part of life and I chose to be here on Earth to fully experience human love and human loss. This deeper childhood grief was triggered to remind me to connect more fully with the Presence of the Divine and the invisible angelic realms which surround me now, and will never abandon me.